A visit from the south

Someone important came past our little town today. I have no idea who it was but like all the other motorists, I was forced to pull over and wait while the cavalcade went by. Do us all a favour and stay home next time.

Nasrallah for Prime Minister - of Israel

He couldn't be any worse than the leaders we have right now.

Hezbollah equipment

I received an interesting set of photos of captured equipment from Lebanon. Note the TOW anti tank missiles in the picture. Also note the date markings.

Olmert dodges the bullet

Olmert has reacted like the lawyer he is. Not one inquiry into the war, not two but three. Wonderful. If one committee is good three must be better of course. If you read this far you may be wondering what the third one is. It's to investigate the home front and what went right and wrong. That's being left to the Comptroller who always produces hard hitting reports that can be safely ignored by any government with the normal weasel words.

To seperate politics and military actions is like asking the police to have two investigators; one for the left hand of the suspect and another for the right hand. The military one will be headed by a Likudnik, the ex chief of staff, Bogie Amnon who will not be expected to criticise his own performance that led up to this fiasco.

Whitewash.

A change

I note that our local shelters have been locked again. I presume no more attacks are expected. Our work shelter is still open for business and the large building where I eat is still minus a lot of windows.

IELTS

Mrs E. is getting very busy. There's a lot of catch up work teaching English as people try to do what didn't happen during the war. A number of people have started brushing up on their IELTS scores. That's the British Council English exams for people who want to emigrate to Canada and other Anglosphere places. She has mixed feelings about this of course.

Shabbat Shlom

A peaceful weekend to everyone, please. Yes, especially our Lebanese neighbours.

Enjoy the War - The peace will be terrible

I either have to stop talking to people, switch off the radio and give up the Internet or I will go mad. Speaking to people about what went wrong and what we should do is driving me crazy. The only, single practical thing I can think of is to go down to the demo tent outside the Prime Minister's office with some garbage bags and gloves and clean up. I'm sure it needs it.

One of the better war picture

This one was taken from the hills overlooking Haifa and the port. The caption isn't mine.

Another ex general goes into politics

There are quite enough ex generals around thanks. How about just retiring, picking up a few board seats, a couple of charities and writing your biography? Moshe "Bogey" Ya'alon , it's a bad move.

US to Israel: No financial aid for war | Jerusalem Post

What a surprise. We get to pay for it as expected. Those wonderfully packaged F16 engines I saw being shipped south cost around $3 million each for a refit.

Israel Defense Forces - The Official Website

Lions led by donkeys. Have a browse of the IDF English web site. Might make you feel a bit better.

Infrequently asked questions

When will we know when this war is over?

When the bomb shelters revert to their intended use which is junk storage, kindergardens, AA meetings and illicit rumpty tumpty.

Protests mount

The natives are restless. Unhappy reservists are starting to ask difficult questions and the IDF brass hats are starting to respond. Too early yet to say what needs to be done. The people in the North are not pleased either. Our local council refuses to put air conditioning in the local shelters on the grounds ' they'd just be stolen'. Thanks. How about local guards then? As we never had enough warning to be sure of making it to the shelters people preferred what shelter they could get at home. No, we can't live for weeks on end in a concrete room with no water or sanitation.

As for the general mood, everyone expects this to start up again but bigger.

An editorial I can agree with

The 'troika' running the military campaign has lost the confidence of the country. No fine words about 'Reconstructing the North' will save Olmert now, and Peretz will have to go as well. Appointing 'special commissioners' for the reconstruction of the North means more bloated bureaucracy on top of what we have already. It will take a lot of imagination to get people to come and live and work in the North and that will take years. May I suggest that 'postponing' the planned upgrade of the single track railway from Acco to Nahariyia is not the way forward?

Doubt cast over wisdom of IDF raid - News from Israel, Ynetnews

From where I'm sitting, the Government of Israel and the IDF have lost their collective mind. Trying to police the borders of Lebanan is futile and doomed to failure. Nobody but the Government of Lebanon is in a position to do it and they can't. Outside troops are not, repeat not coming over to do it either.

Bush: It could take time for world to view war as a Hezbollah loss - Haaretz - Israel News

Yes, I will ask difficult , painful questions. Why no British troops in Lebanon? Why no French troops in Lebanon? That's a slam dunk. Because Israel failed and the US administration failed and Europe is not going to help out any more. Sorry. Israel has to clean up it's own mess starting from the inside.

Olmert needs a reality check

An open letter to Prime Minister Olemert;

I read today that the disengagment plane is on hold and your number one priority is the rebuilding of the North. This is like announcing that your number one priority is putting your trousers on in the morning. Even if Israel was run by a coalition of Seventh Day Adventists and the Mooneys, this would be number one on the list. You will not win the elections this year with that as a slogan. You will not win unless you build the Kadmina party structure which is so absent right now. You will not win unless you make more of an effort than you are now.

I would like to welcome you to visit the North and listen to the views of the local residents. We have a number of slowly rotting tomatoes you might appreciate.

Current scandals

I got confused with who's done what, why when etc. Nothing like Israelis for a good bit of character assassination.

Our current Prime Minister, Ehud Olmert is under investigation for the sale and leaseback of his Jerusalem home.

The current Ramatkal is under a cloud for selling shares the day war broke out. "War, what war?". His performance as Chief of Staff is not seen as being that brilliant.

Our President ,Moshe Katsav, is accused of sexual harassment and abuse of power, especially with young woman.

The transport minister, Shaul Mofaz, seems to have forgotten the lesson, 'lead from the front'. Or perhaps he was.

Tzahi Hanegbi , the ex security minister, not content with a suspended six month sentence for expressing his views with a swinging iron chain, is now under criminal invesitgation for illegal political appointments.

Omri Sharon, Arik's son, is heading for prison for corruption. He starts in October as far as I know.

I was going to cover ex Knesset members actually in prison, but I got bored with the whole thing. Wasn't there another one who's being investigated for a less than voluntary French kiss? How did he manage that? Ah yes, Justice Minister Haim Ramon who is under a cloud for indecent assault. Some very limited experiments have shown that without using restraints and some hard to find surgical clamps, it is impossibledifficult to French kiss someone against their will. I look forward to the trial with interest.

Did we win/

Let's see.

• The only thing that stopped rockets landing near my house was a UN ceasefire.
• The kidnapped soldiers remain kidnapped
  
• Hezbollah is still a going concern.

Looks like we haven't - yet. Oh, and that every so well spoken MFA person who regularly appears on the BBC World Service, yes, it's true that the IAF destroyed every launcher after it fired. Key word here is - after. The launch crew, alignment unit and the rocket stock are the valuable bits. You can build a new launcher out of an old pickup truck and sheet metal in a few days.

...continued

Sorry about the interrupted post. My burbling, bubbling tummy finally erupted and I ended up on a drip with a Doctor, nurse and an anxious Mrs E. I haven't experienced anything like that since my stag night all those years ago with 12 pints of beer followed by curry.

Anyway, as I was saying, the general feeeling of everyone I met was:

• Dan Haultz should be fired, sacked, dismissed. Followed by other things too cruel to mention. His performance is seen as sub standard
• Olmert should go as well.
• Kadima is finished and we must have new elections
• No more unilateral pullouts.
• The IDF needs to change it's priorities. Infantry equipment rather than F16s
  

The last straw for the Ramatkal was the news that he sold shares the day the war broke out. Mind you, when I found out today that Shaul Mofaz, ex- Ramatkal , ex Defence Minister and the current transport minister had been chased 30 kilometers by police last week indicates that he should add ex-transport minister to his list of credits. If you think I exagerate, check out our doyenne of bloggers.

Damnit

Yes, I've already broken my break. As I'm not at work today having fun with gastroenteritis and learning all the tile patterns on the bathroom floor, I can get to the computer. One of the reasons I wanted a break was that I won't have to comment on the mess that always follows a war. Went to the local computer shop to get some replacement printer cartridges and the bookshop. What I heard left me trembling.

Break

I'm going back to my blog break. Enough is enough. When I'm allowed into the blogger beta programme it will be a new blog.

No noise

I keep looking up for the F16s. They aren't flying anymore. My personal thanks to all the ground crews who worked so hard over the last four weeks.

Deep Falafel

Deep Falafel is fine , looking forward to some sleep now that the guns have fallen silent. He'll be back in civvies by the weekend and will take some days off after a difficult three weeks. Right now things are very quiet up North but Islamic Jihad continues to fire rockets from Gaza.

Ceasefire?

Well, it's about to start, or perhaps it started already. Nobody here would take a bet on it. I suppose the inevitable questions will start flying around, even more than the ones being asked already. Some crucial ones.

• Did Israel win? Does the term 'win or 'lose have any meaning in this kind of war?
• Who gets to pay for it all ? (I suspect I know the answer - we do)
• Will the North of Israel recover to something like the pre war state?
• Who will come out top in the so inevitable elections this year?
• How did us bloggers do in general?
• Did our very expensive Air Force do the business and will they be allowed to buy the JSF in a few years?
• Was there another choice?

It'll take a while before the answers come in.

Update: - 0715 - Sirens in Haifa and the planes are streaming past the house.

Close and a lot of them

We had a very near miss. Luckily no damage but it rattled the windows. Just heard some more in the distance as well.

Update: More sirens today than any other time. More rockets and IDF planes sorties beyond count.

Nothing to say

We're just waiting for it to end.

It's a what?

So the war that isn't a war is over except that it's not.

Back to the future

It is evident that there will be new elections in Israel this year. Judging by the remarks I hear perhaps Mr Olmert and Mr Halutz may care to emulate Gorodish. I and many like us would be happy to pay for air fare. One way naturally. Families not included in this offer. Terms and conditions may apply.

Party time

I went to an 'End of the World' party in my favourite watering hole in downtown Haifa. The idea was that Hezbollah would launch everything they had before a UN mandated ceasefire so we ,ight as well party. It didn't happen. Had a good time though. Thanks to to 'Alex' and 'Angel' and my ever so new evil henceman. I will explain my decrees as the new Evil Overlord of the Galaxy later.

Bummer

No injuries, no deaths I repeat like a mantra. Over and over again. It's only bricks and mortar after all. I'll eat there again. In the meantime, as I'm too wired to sleep I shall go stray dog hunting.

Sounds - Part 96

If it's a double , low throated 'boom' it's over the hills, away from the wonderful valley where I live. A 'thud' sound means it was close but not too close. A 'thud-crack' sound means it was next door. The geeky, nerdy side of me thinks about sound propagation through air and attenuation by frequency. The'crack' bit might be higher frequencies. Anything written on the subject? Part of me muses on whether shrapnel fragments are sub sonic or not. I am so painfully ignorant on small arms ballistics.


Deep Falafel rings. He's fine. He tells me things I do not want to hear but listen to. Workmate rings from a break in the Dead Sea. 'Yes, fine'. 'No I didn't see the TV... oh shit...' , 'How many injured'.

The phone rings again and again. Mrs E. is upset. Her hosts are upset that I wasn't there yesterday. I explain. The phone rings again. I'm still pulled over by the side of the road as I don;t drive and phone. I ring to sort things out. Sirens again. I leave the car and go to the bushes feeling really stupid and lie down. Phone rings. 'It hit where?'

No dead or injured yet. I had an interview this morning. I'm not Israeli enough. I shouldn't be allowed to work around without a full time guide. Food and sleep next.

Sounds

It will be the sounds I'll remember when this is all over. The sirens sound and you hear a mother in the street with her child saying 'Hurry, hurry, I'll pick it up". They walk fast. Don't run.In the night I can hear the planes doing engine tests with the occasional check flight. There is a difference in the sound;no afterburners on flight test. You count the sounds. Two take off, two more. You can't hear them land except when it's very quiet say 3 a.m. and you sitting in the car listening to the World Service trying to make sense of it all. Wham - very close - more whams sirens again - always the sirens sound to go to the shelter, they never sound the all-clear. They never will.

Planes take off again. Low flying helicopters again and again.

Still here

The Eggheads went to a wedding. Well half of them, Master Egghead is helping out down south and Miss Egghead is still in the UK. I hope she stays there until this is over.
The location of the wedding changed three times - Home Command get a say in this things- and went wonderfully. A credit to the parents and all the others. Mrs E. is 'South' with friends. I went to visit old workmates. Deep Falafel is busy but vertical and breathing.

Have a nice weekend if you can.

BAA

Well, slap me in the face with a wet haddock. The BAA Heathrow website is 'overloaded'.

Guy Fawkes - Wikipedia, the free encyclopedia

If I hear another Israel telling me that 'Anglia doesn't understand terrorism' I shall go mad and force three day old humous down their ignorant throats.

As far as I'm concerned, it started for England on November 5th 1605 and has been around , intermittently ever since.

People vary

Of course, people are different. We change and respond. When the sirens go, the people of the ground floor (1st to left pondians) stay put. Our current ethos is to make for the protected area with it's ever so reassuring blast walls. The people from the flimsy shed across the way come to join us but don't feel comfortable. Then it's the eternal dilemma. How long should I stay? Wait for the first to go? Home Command say 15 minutes. The lady on the PA system doesn't speak anymore. We head upstairs only to hear the sirens again and down we go for another go.

Senior IDF officer: Deployment along Litani will take a week - News from Israel, Ynetnews

I have read a great deal of military history over the years. Mr Eliot Cohen's book on Supreme Command which compares the political-military relationships of five war statesmen comes to mind. He narrates the methods and travails of Lincoln, Churchilll,Clemenceau, Ben Gurion and Lyndon Johnson.

Nowhere, in any book I have read, suggests that political-military decisions should be directly communicated to the enemy.

Police: Missile fired at Hadera - News from Israel, Ynetnews

Oh, I loved this news report from Ynet.

It was also feared that a rocket landed in Haifa’s downtown area; security forces dispatched to the scene found the remnants of a rocket, it is estimated that the remnants are those of a rocket that was fired in a previous attack on the city or were placed there by residents.

Sure. Us people in Haifa are just so going around planting rocket remnants in various places. I mean, who wouldn't these days? Such a natural urge to collect or make rocket remnants and put them places so the security forces can find them. Personally, I prefer the slimly green aliens from Alpha Proximus who have the hots for Islamic Earthbound Extremists.

Getting weary

It certainly is getting noisy around here. Deep Falafel is Ok and fast asleep. Our receptionist got called up. She's a media representative.

Odd

Sirens from further South and the normal boom, bang , thud. No idea where they went.

Ships and the sea

I paused on the way to work via downtown Haifa and parked by the beach for a while. It was heartening to see container ships in view on the horizon. We're stirred, shaken but Haifa is open for business.

More and more all leaping though the frothy shore

Gosh. There are a lot of you. I'm fine now thanks, just rewiring our refugee's hard dryer and tidying up the router connections. Time for a nap now. Distant sirens as usual but not much else. All the action is further North I think. Strangely enough, I have not had endless personal offers of free plane tickets and hotel stays in exotic places. Is there a number I can ring?

Visitors

What a lot all at one time. You're all very welcome and the emails are interesting. I will try and answer but no promises. Here's a few answers to questions that seemed to repeat, especially from my USA visitors.

• Yes, there are Arabs in Israel. Also Jews, Christians, Druze, Bahai which can be sub divided a lot. Bear in mind I had a problem convincing a degree educated Israeli that there were Catholics in England.
• Yes, I can be proud of my heritage. I do have red lines though. One of my ancestors got rich running the triangular trade route from Bristol - West Africa - Virginia with the last leg packed with slaves. I don't want to follow that route. Likewise his grandfather who was hung for sheep stealing.
• Carpet bombing is not acceptable. Even if your morals tell you it's ok, it has limited military efficiency. See Bomber Harris WW2. Get your own links if you need more details.
• I'm not a Zionist. This is not 1948.
• Jews don't want to conquer the world. They just to be able to live in it until something better comes along.
• No, we are not the best and greatest things around on the planet. Basically ordinary people trying to get along.
• Beer is available in quantity in Israel. Thanks for the offer and gift certificates may travel better.
• I'm not at work today because my bowels are playing up. I'll be there tomorrow like the last four weeks.
• I don't run for the shelter because the warning time is too short. We have an 'inner place' This is Home Command rules, not mine.
• It is not a secret that Israel has F16s. Even if it was, it's not now.
  

Hope all that helped and stay well. I'll do another batch tomorrow.

Visitors

Well, my hit count went through the roof yesterday so I assume the interview was broadcast somewhere. I was so nervous, I don't remember what I said which is very odd. The rest of the world could know and I don't. Is this the way it always works?

More of the same.

After a bout with a stomach bug that had me carry stacks of books into the bathroom, I'm sort of recovered. Empty but vertical and breathing. The F16s were very busy during the night so I'm hoping for a bit of sleep right now. No work today.

I'm famous!

My fifteen minutes of fame came around. Shawn from Clear Channel Radio in the states interviewed me. Very bad news from Haifa. Very bad.

Wham

Sirens, more sirens. Thuds and echoes of bangs. Bang. We all sit against the wall. Radio on. No news yet. No sirens. Silence. Even the birds stop.

Same old - same old

Just noise again, no real problems unlike the dead and injured further North. I hope to have pictures of the Katuyasha mud party held in my village last night sometime soon.

My new love

Yes, Mrs E. is not happy. I have a new love in my life. She's very black, has four legs and spent a few hours under our house last night quietly crying. A lovely black Labrador. Very scared. She would take knick-knack from my hand but refused the water. Flea collar, owners collar and a lumpy bit just where the Rfid tag should be . She's gone now and my heart is empty.

Wake up

Sirens in the distance. Boom and boom again. Just where we used to live.Our guest wakes up but Mrs E. sleeps on. A guy from the IDF rings me to say thanks. All I did was give them a knife for the chem warfare vehicle so they could cut the ty-wraps on the hub cap. I don't even want it back.

Tread carefully now. People are on edge and nervy. I shall calm down by washing my car.

Wake up call

Friday doze, sirens sounding, heart pounding, no time for the shelter - make it to the protected area - wham- bang windows rattle blam - blam - blam things fall over- shouting , then silence. Wait. wait some more. The phone rings. "You OK?". "Yes. Where was it ? Close, very close. Stay inside."

Sweat. It's hot. People on the roof next door point. Fires nearby. Sirens in the distance and the police and ambulances arrive. One turns around in my drive. People head back from schul. Shabbat makes a start with the radio on.

Tony Blair goes on holiday

Have a nice time Tony. I expect you'll be glad to step down sometime soon especially with people like Richard Burden in the party who'll I'll quote from the Indie.

Richard Burden, the Labour chairman of the all-party Parliamentary Britain-Palestine group, said: "I think his argument that Hamas, al-Qa'ida and Hizbollah can be lumped together is wrong."

Post post. He's not going on holiday.

It's Friday

At least I'm not living in a bomb shelter permanently like those poor people further North. It's Friday! Hooray! So what do I do? I go to work of course, sad person that I am.

Bad day

Sadly,casualties again from Lebanese rockets. Seven dead , five critically wounded and all the attendant loss and misery. I will have a lot more to say when all this is over.

Completion of inquiry into July 30th incident in Qana

The English version of the results of the inquiry into the Qana incident is available on the link above.

The Chief of Staff emphasized that "The Hizbullah organization places Lebanese civilians as a defensive shield between itself and us while IDF places itself as a defensive shield between the citizens of Israel and Hizbullah's terror. That is the principal difference between us."

1559

If you read the text of UN Security Council resolution 1559, it calls for

Calls for the disbanding and disarmament of all Lebanese and non-Lebanese militias;

So, if Hezbollah can ignore that one, why should they accept a UN mandated ceasefire? I'll answer my own question. One works against them and one for. They'll obey the one that suits them. When I first came to Israel, I found it hard to understand why Israelis dislike the UN so much. I understand now.

Hey, I've just thought of the solution to the violence in Iraq. We just get the Security Council to vote for a ceasefire. I'm amazing. Why didn't anyone else think of that?

Nasrallah

I echatted with Nasrallah yesterday. Yes, really. He's a Christian Arab from Haifa and he's heard all the jokes thank you. I met him some years ago in a watering hole I used to frequent and he told me of his new office close to the central Post Office. Last week, he was cleaning up when a rocket hit near the Post Office. Luckily it was close at the time. I must persuade him to start blogging.

More boomim

Loud and close. Very scary this time. Mrs E. was boomed at at home as well.

A mixed day

Although we only had one alert here, they seem to have suffered further North. Oh well. It will end one day.

I get to stay home

All my workmates get to go to Frankfurt next week to meet some left pondians who are not allowed within 2000 klicks of Israel. I, of course, get to stay here. Yah, boo sucks. I'll bite the carpet and hold my breath if they don't let me go. An evening of German beer? Yes, please.

Boomim

In street Hebrew, the plural of boom is 'boomim'. There is a proper Hebrew word but boomim seems to be favourite right now. After a few days lull, we're back to sirens again. Best wishes to all the guys further North and to the people from work heading for Army duty today.

Baalbek operation completed successfully

I never blogged about this before as I dislike public ridicule as much as the next person. If you examine the photo in this article, you will now nod your head slowly when I tell you that the IDF has donkeys and llamas on inventory. Deep Falafel is somewhere close to where this picture was taken.

Asides

I know my obsession with the news is bothering Mrs E. when she says 'Why don't you go and find some decent porn on the Internet instead of the news?'

Olmert: We never promised to eliminate rocket threat - News from Israel, Ynetnews

No, of course you didn't. Seven million Israelis were under a collective delusion a few weeks ago.

“We will agree to a ceasefire when we know for certain that the conditions on the ground will be different from those which led to this war,”

Hmm.. Hezbollah agrees to wear a different style uniform perhaps? UN Peace keepers with Humvees rather than those oh so sixties APCs they normally tool around in?
Or perhaps all Shias agree to pray with their hands by their sides rather than in front? Ok, might be the other way around, I forget.

Not exactly Churchillian rhetoric. I suggest a stiff whisky and water followed by lots of sleep and a new speech writer. War leaders never explain and never apologise. That bit comes afterwards.

Noisy

Oh, very noisy now. Sort of 'jump out your skin' type noisy.

Lebanon: We will sue Israel in Hague

Sounds of hollow laughter from here. Lebanon and Israel have one thing in common. Neither have ratified the Rome Statute of the International Criminal Court. There are no signatories at all from the Middle East. The USA has made it very clear that development funding would cease if that country signed up. So Lebanese Minister of Justice Charles Rizk is blowing smoke and he knows it.

The still and peaceful night

Still serene though our esteemed Prime Minister has told us to be ready for 'more rockets'. I'm prepared. If anyone understands what the hell is going on , please provide a summary. I'll post it with credits. I don't mean the standard 'they attacked us so we responded ', or 'Zionist illegal entity launches unprovoked attack on innocent Arab women and children'.

I want the sort of dry history that school children in one hundred years will be bored to death with.